Gracies Blog

I write because I have to. Not because I have a million amazing thoughts racing around my head that must be written down, or that I have ideas nobody has ever heard, words worth repeating, insights, perspectives or lessons nobody else has learned.  I don’t write because I’m clever, have a way with words or because people care. Nobody’s life depends on it, it doesn't save lives and nor may it change lives.  I have no delusions of grandeur. My life is no more full of things worth writing about than yours. You and I are the same. We do stuff and go to bed. I write because I must. It opens me up, and slows me down. It hands me a shovel and says – here dig. Dig around and see what’s already there, waiting patiently to be found. Writing opens my eyes, and opens my heart.  Writing are my glasses and my pacemaker.  Perhaps you must dance, take photos of bugs, sing quietly to yourself, or cook meals for those you love. It takes courage to quieten the ...

Words hurt. Critical, condescending words bury deep inside children and haunt them for years, if not life. I don’t know how serious my runaway thoughts were when I was a teenager, but I certainly had some dark years. My school experience left me with two conflicting and lingering thoughts. No one is going to tell me what I can and can’t do with my life. I had to overcome many barriers to become a public speaker.  Words are powerful. We ALL have a heavy responsibility in the way we speak to kids; parents, teachers, all adults alike. We can either encourage kids to claim their power and live their true life, or we can keep therapists busy helping people overcome damaging words from the past. Thich Nhat Hanh offers this awesome statement about using loving words: Aware that words can create suffering or happiness, I am committed to speaking truthfully and constructively, using only words that inspire hope and confidence. Ask yourself some pointed questions before spea...

Regrets? We've all had a few. Whether its things you did and wished you didn't, or things you never did and wished you had, the sting of regret bites hard. ` Whenever one door closes, another one always opens´.  “It’s not that you don’t regret things in life, but you at least try to learn from them.” We should all keep something flawed or misspelled close by to remind us that this is the nature of life. If we get hung up on imperfections, we will live in a state of perpetual regret. Its what’s on the inside that matters, and the inside is where we handle disappointment without lapsing into bitterness or regret.  If you keep in the back of your mind that one day you will be looking back on choices you make today, you can make choices now that you will be proud of for years to come. (or not, because none of us is perfect , but this is a later step and I don’t want to regret getting ahead of myself here).  But as far as is humanly possible, make c...

  I ain't worthy, but I still believe. I ain't perfect, but I still try. I ain't smart, but I still read. I ain't beautiful, but I still love. I ain't anything near what you got, but I ain't hating. I may not be what you want, need, or fantasize, but I'm still me. Take me as I am, or leave me the way I'll be. I have no idea where this strength is coming from. To get up when I was hurt, to care when no one has cared for me, to walk alone in the dark without anyone's hand to touch. And I guess it came from me, the knowledge that this is the person I am meant to be.

We ALL want rock solid self confidence, but what is it and where does it come from? Here are some of my current thoughts on confidence. I don’t see myself as confident. Most of my life, I've attempted things I didn't feel equipped for, but I tend to put my head down and go for it anyway. Some might call me naive! Persistent? YES, that’s my middle name! In any case, realizing that I’m not particularly confident but I AM persistent and I am generally optimistic. Confidence is generally your belief in your own ability (based on past experience) while optimism is a big picture perspective. In other words, I don’t know if I can do this, but I will do my best and trust that it will all work out as it needs to.  Confidence depends on me. Optimism depends on me + forces beyond me. Optimism operates despite confidence, but true confidence needs the guiding hand of optimism to make sure ego doesn't spin out of control. And then when my sense of purpose gives me confidence that I...

It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes. Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live and let's change the way we treat each other. You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do what we gotta do, to survive. And still I see no changes. Can't a brother get a little peace? There's war on the streets and the war in the Middle East. Instead of war on poverty, they got a war on drugs so the police can bother me. And I ain't never did a crime I ain't have to do. But now I'm back with the facts givin' 'em back to you. Don't let 'em jack you up, back you up, crack you up and pimp smack you up. You gotta learn to hold ya own. They get jealous when they see ya with ya mobile phone. But tell the cops they can't touch this. I don't trust this, when they try to rush I bust this. That's the sound of my tool. You say it ain't cool, but mama didn't raise no fool. And as long as I...

    Over the years, I have come to realize that the greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity, or power, but self-rejection. Success, popularity, and power can indeed present a great temptation, but their seductive quality often comes from the way they are part of the much larger temptation to self-rejection. When we have come to believe in the voices that call us worthless and unlovable, then success, popularity, and power are easily perceived as attractive solutions. The real trap, however, is self-rejection. As soon as someone accuses me or criticizes me, as soon as I am rejected, left alone, or abandoned, I find myself thinking, "Well, that proves once again that I am a nobody." ... [My dark side says,] I am no good... I deserve to be pushed aside, forgotten, rejected, and abandoned. Self-rejection is the greatest enemy of the spiritual life because it contradicts the sacred voice that calls us the "Beloved." Being the Beloved constitutes the co...